I need to start writing more.
I have all these dreams and ideas.
I want to look back on life and say, “I accomplished them.”
But right now I look back at my life and think, “where did I
go wrong?”
I walked through Wayne State last week and saw some former
faculty and hung out with Yesmeen. She mentioned how much she loved my
monologue exercise with the chair above your head. I remember thinking just how
much I enjoyed working with students and being trusted. I recalled all the
dreams that I had coming out of Wayne State and wanting to accomplish them.
First things first…I’ve accomplished many things. I’m part
of AEA AND SAG/AFTRA now which is pretty incredible. I never even dreamed of
that. I’ve been paid (and paid well to be an actor) in theatre, film, and now
television. I have the potential.
But now I need to develop a career that’s worth managing.
I want to buy a weekly MTA card.
In order to do that I have to stay in town.
I need to be taking classes every week. Figuring out what
are the most benefitial to me as an actor.
It’s depressing to me that I won’t be in town for a weekend
until November. It’s September now.
I want to teach still. I want to be a working actor. I want
to be auditioning all the time.
I want to be a better son and brother and uncle and friend.
I want to live in New York City.
I want to live in Chicago.
I want to live in Minneapolis.
I want to live in Kansas City.
I want to live in Iowa.
I want to create a one man show and put the fucker up and
perform it.
I want to speak about what it means to be an American and
find the commonalities.
I want to help liberals understand conservatives more.
I want to do an interview talking about the process that I’ve
done this amazing work.
But first, I need to calm down. Focus. Work with an economy
of movement. Start little by little. Conduct an interview. Write to an agent.
Take a class with a casting director. One of those a day. That’s all it has to
be.
Begin.
