In Regards to the Eleventh Time I've Written Something Akin to This

I need to start writing more.

I have all these dreams and ideas.

I want to look back on life and say, “I accomplished them.”

But right now I look back at my life and think, “where did I go wrong?”

I walked through Wayne State last week and saw some former faculty and hung out with Yesmeen. She mentioned how much she loved my monologue exercise with the chair above your head. I remember thinking just how much I enjoyed working with students and being trusted. I recalled all the dreams that I had coming out of Wayne State and wanting to accomplish them.

First things first…I’ve accomplished many things. I’m part of AEA AND SAG/AFTRA now which is pretty incredible. I never even dreamed of that. I’ve been paid (and paid well to be an actor) in theatre, film, and now television. I have the potential.

But now I need to develop a career that’s worth managing.

I want to buy a weekly MTA card.

In order to do that I have to stay in town.

I need to be taking classes every week. Figuring out what are the most benefitial to me as an actor.

It’s depressing to me that I won’t be in town for a weekend until November. It’s September now.

I want to teach still. I want to be a working actor. I want to be auditioning all the time.

I want to be a better son and brother and uncle and friend.

I want to live in New York City.

I want to live in Chicago.

I want to live in Minneapolis.

I want to live in Kansas City.

I want to live in Iowa.

I want to create a one man show and put the fucker up and perform it.

I want to speak about what it means to be an American and find the commonalities.

I want to help liberals understand conservatives more.

I want to do an interview talking about the process that I’ve done this amazing work.

But first, I need to calm down. Focus. Work with an economy of movement. Start little by little. Conduct an interview. Write to an agent. Take a class with a casting director. One of those a day. That’s all it has to be.

Begin.

Regarding the Long Journey to Kill the General Actor

"I don't think we really need anymore general actors." - Deborah Hedwall

It feels so good to be in an acting class again. One of my biggest goals when I moved to New York City was to find a scene study class and, just before the four year mark, I found it.

I started taking class with Deborah Hedwall in late September of 2016 and, simply put. it's made me a better actor. It's the acting class I've always wanted. She's a sensitive teacher who drives home simple concepts over and over again.

Action. Action. Action. What are you doing?
Who am I? Point of view. Global Glasses.

I leave the class inspired and with a clearer understanding of the craft of acting and building a character....and also alternately thinking acting is easy and acting is the hardest thing in the world.

Some recurring themes that have stuck with me:

Core circumstance - take this away and the scene wouldn't exist. What's the dilemma...every scene is about a dilemma

Global glasses - I am a _________ in a world of __________.

Curiosity - people stay in the scene because they're CURIOUS about the dilemma

Specificity - ask a question, why, because, why, because...

Playing a quality is a dead end

Emotion life is revealed through action

Front Loading - creating a situation for just before the scene that raises the stakes.

As If/Substitution

Stop smiling - don't let people off the hook with your smile.

Stillness - you're really going to enjoy stillness.

POV + ACTION, not emotion

Direct hit scene

Spine - relationship to the world

"Technique is what you do when you don't know what to do" - Uta Hagen